Summer Camp Stress

Diabetes is a chronic disease that is manageable. That's not to say that the managing isn't a full time job. Even with myself, my husband, a team of specialists and AJ working to maintain good blood sugar numbers, it doesn't always happen. We have our good days and our bad.

However, diabetes doesn't usually impact our lives dramatically on a day to day basis. Yes, there are the small annoyances like school parties. Typically the treats get packed up and sent home. This bothers him a little bit but we deal with it. With all the allergies that kids have he knows he's not the only one in the school.

Unfortunately, there are times that I am painfully reminded that my son is "different". My feelings of guilt, sadness, anger, frustration, etc. that accompany this disease always seem to rear their ugly heads during this time of year. What is so special about February you might ask. Hard to imagine, since we have about 30 inches of snow on the ground, but this is the time when camp information starts flying around. Our area is lucky to have some great camp programs. The problem is that most of them don't have a nurse that could deal with AJ's medical needs. I doubt that many (if any) programs are going to take the responsibility of counting carbs and giving insulin. Even if they are willing, will I be comfortable with the situation?

Diabetes camps do exist. The problem is that most are only for about a week or two. And all the overnight camps start at 7 or 8. We do take part in a week long diabetes camp in Delaware. It is an hour drive each way, which means 4 hours a day of driving. Of course, it is worth it because he has a blast. He loves to meet other kids that know what it's like to have the big D.

So where does that leave me? Well there is a camp fair coming up on the 28th. I plan on attending and I am going to cross my fingers that I find a program that will work for us. Otherwise, this may be a VERY long summer.

May Her Memory Be For A Blessing

One month ago today on January 9th my dear friend Shari passed away. She was a wife and devoted mother to a beautiful 6 year old girl. She was also an all around amazing woman and friend.

To be truthful I have been avoiding my blog for the past month because I can't seem to put into words all that I feel. And sometimes the "feeling" still hurts too much. Maybe at some point in the future I will write more. For now I'm just going to remember her smile and how it could bring such happiness to all around her.

Happy Birthday AJ!

I'm not sure where the time goes. Can my little boy really be 6?? It seems like just yesterday when we brought him home.

Casey Johnson

It is always unpleasant when we hear of someone so young passing. It seems as though Hollywood has had more than it's share of such tragedies in the recent news. I always feel bad upon hearing about these young celebrities. No matter how a person lived their life, death is always sad. It certainly seems a shame that people who are loved by so many and have so many privileges can succumb to such a tragic end. That certainly seems to be the case with Casey Johnson who recently died at the age of 30 from unknown causes. Although I didn't know Casey her death has hit closer to home. Casey was a young socialite who was known in the tabloids for her famous lesbian affairs and party girl life style. What is not as well known is that she also suffered from Type 1 Diabetes. In fact, her father Robert "Woody" Johnson, owner of the Jets, is chairman of the JDRF. At this point we don't know how, or even if, her diabetes played any part in her death.

Besides feeling sad I also feel a bit angry. Perhaps it's just timing. As I write this a dear friend is literally fighting for her life. Yet, Casey, who had so many opportunities available to her seemingly threw her life away. I know that nothing has been proven yet, but it does seem fairly obvious that she was involved with drugs and alcohol. This can't be healthy for anyone but it is of particular concern for anyone with a serious health condition.

This leads me to the next reason that her death has me upset. I know that at some point soon my son will start asking me questions relating to his own lifespan and the effects of diabetes. I already find myself quickly changing stations whenever Type 2 diabetes commercials are on. They mostly always mention the long term side effects of diabetes, such as impotency, heart disease, etc.

Aiden is a very active participant in his own diabetes management. He can check his blood sugar. When told the number of carbohydrates, he can use his pump to give himself insulin. We have talked often about how we all need to work hard to keep him healthy. However, I struggle with how much much information I need to share with him. After all he is only 5! He has enough added stress in his life. I don't want to scare him with the repercussions that can happen if he doesn't take care of himself. But is omitting the truth the same as lying? What do you think?

Bueller, Bueller

Ah, so this is what Blogger looks like. I had forgotten. For all two of you that used to read, you may wonder why I disappeared. It was for the following two reasons.

1. Facebook: I'll admit I got sucked into the vortex and couldn't seem to juggle my time. And I didn't even play Farmville or Mafia Wars.

2. I will admit that one of my more annoying personality traits is a case of perfectionism. I am an all or nothing kind of girl. I either do it perfectly or don't do it at all. My blog suffered from this mindset. I kept comparing myself to others. Let's face it there are some really good blogs out there. What can I write about that will be exciting? My life is pretty darn boring. A lot of the blogs that I see are money making blogs and involve lots of give aways. I was feeling the pressure to make mine compare to that.

So now I've gotten real with myself. I don't have a professional background in PR, marketing, journalism, or business. So if you want to win something you can stop reading now. I also won't be worrying about my stats; i.e how many readers I have.

I've decided to use this blog as more of a journal for myself and my children. Someday I hope they can look back and get a glimpse of who we all were. I'd be more than happy for you to come read and comment. But if not I'm okay having a blogging party of one:)

Wordless Wednesday

My speed demons!

A Novel In the Making Or Just a Clumsy Fat Girl??

I'm thinking I should start writing a novel. It would be a novel along the lines of Bridget Jones Diary or any of the Jen Lancaster books. I just think that I should somehow profit off of the idiocy of my life. Take this past weekend for example.

I had been hearing about the Zumba workout craze for a while now. For those that haven't heard of it Zumba "fuses hypnotic latin rhythms and easy to follow moves to create a fun aerobic workout". Easy to follow for some, but not me... more on that in a bit. Some of the girls at my gym have been raving about it. I am not usually one to take classes. Too many nightmarish memories of step classes with girls in their thong unitards. Whenever I have taken any aerobics class it seems that while everyone else is kicking up to the left I'm still over to the right doing G-d knows what, all the while trying not to have a heart attack. I explained this to one of the Zumba girls but she assured me that it was nothing like that. So one of my good friends and I took the class together on Friday afternoon. I expected to sweat a lot and feel like dying, so no surprise there. However, the Latin American instructor was like an over-crazed Chihuahua. Her feet were doing things that mine will just never do. So I just kicked my feet around in the hopes that I would somehow look like I knew what I was doing. Meanwhile, the Latin culture tends to have a certain sexual vibe which I'm sure Zumba is supposed to convey. However, this chubster felt about as sexy as these lovely ladies:

So on Saturday I woke up a little sore but feeling good. AJ's soccer game is canceled due to the rain so I figure it's a good opportunity to try a Pilates class. I have done Pilates about 3-4 times before. The last time I had done it I ended up getting extremely ill the next day, which included a 103 degree fever. But I chalked it up to coincidence.

This time around I manage to survive through the class and was actually feeling pretty good about things. The instructor knew I was a beginner and after the class she said I did really well. My stomach muscles were sore in a good way. Yeah, a class I can do! Fast forward about 2 hours. I was barely able to sit because my spine and tailbone were so sore. They felt like they should have been covered in black and blues. Then my back started to really bother me. My shirt rubbing against me was hurting. I finally lifted my shirt up and looked at my back in the mirror. That's when I noticed that part of it was missing. Literally missing. I have a huge circle of missing skin. I have a red gaping hole in my back. Fabulous.

Maybe fat chicks are just destined to stay fat!